My sister-in-law should have been in the dentist's office with me a couple of weeks ago. I was waiting for my daughter, when the woman sitting across from me in the waiting area got a call. She talked for a while, apparently forgetting she wasn't in her own living room. Then, quite suddenly she "came to" and looked around her. She glanced at me, resentfully, as if my presence might be interrupting her "flow".
Then she gave me the look that I translated as, "you're trying to listen in, aren't you." (Well, DUH, I'm a writer). So she stood up and moved to the toy alcove across the room. This obviously gave her permission to talk even louder. The poor receptionist had to raise her voice to speak over the phone talker. But my favorite part was when she was called in to talk to the dentist. She didn't even miss a syllable. She got up without tripping on any toys, pushed past the receptionist and plowed through the inner office door, the phone still attached to her ear. Wow. Impressive.
If she would've gotten off her phone for a second, I could've asked her a very pressing question. What had she done in her life to become so important? I could've taken notes, told my friends the secrets to her success, etc. I want to be that important. I think I'm going to get one of those things that hooks onto my ear. Hands free. Yep, that's what I need. Then I can pick through the apples at the grocery store and still keep talking. Or, hey, maybe I'll just leave my phone in the car, and make my calls when I'm in a quieter, more private place. Like church or the library.
I like to sit behind phone talkers on the bus. I get out my phone, and mimic everything they say, with a one-second delay. Or else, maybe I'll blow on the back of their head until they're done talking.
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